So my husband and I adopted out our only daughter and last child, a year ago this last november.

They had stayed near us for 9 days waiting for the girl to be born, the whole time stating the fact theyd come see us in the summer time,, or christmas. And if they couldnt, they would send us a DVD of her first year. Nothing, but pictures and a phone call here and there. I hate talking on the phone. Im not social, in fact im depressed now more than I ever was. In the agreement, it was very very open. Now Im PO'd becuase since November, We have had NO pics, NO dvd and NO visitations set up. Yes they live acoss the country. But they ae doctors! They can afford a 700$ + week trip out here so i can see my daughter! They promised, and they broke their promise. over and over again. Haven't even heard from them since the beginning of the month, and the mom was mad I sent them thank you flowers for xmas! Was that family a mistake!?

I'm angered that your article seems to focus on the negative. Not all birth mothers are drug addicts or alcoholics. How about the ones that go on to complete a college education, have a career?

I became a birth mother at 16. I was ill prepared to raise a child, especially without my families support - emotionally or financially. I was a normal teenager, without all the scare tactics you've mentioned here.

I understand that adoptive parents are the parents - what they say goes, but before you say the birth parents are whiny or needy. Unless you've given up a child for adoption please do NOT try and ignore the pain and heart ache associated with that decision. It's never easy, you never forget, and not for one minute do you EVER forget that the adoptive parents are your child's parents. You are at the whim & mercy of the adoptive parents whether you're allowed to see your child, get updates, pictures.

I did write more but I'm limited to 10000 characters.

I have also placed a child in an "open" adoption. I completely agree with your comments about this article. I found it quite offensive, the portrayal of the birthparents is all to often that of a drug addicted, go nowhere type of person. I have done quite well for myself and I believe this has caused the a-parents intense jealousy. My theory about the "drug addict" etc. assumption is it allows adoptive parents to feel better about them selves or some how more intitled to the child then the birthparents. My daughter is 13 now and I am still at the whim and mercy of her adopted parents, as is she. She may be aloud to visit with us on rare occation, but even then I can tell that this causes her to feel intense guilt. It seems she feels that it is her job to protect the feelings of her a-parents. Quite sad really.