I have been married for 5 yrs my husband and i have 4 kids. however here lately we fight for almost everything. now he says what ever to what ever i say when we are getting a disagreement or argument? does this mean he really does not care? we both say some mean things to each other? i really cant say that easy that i LOVE HIM. i know it goes the same for him too.

if anyone can help me out with this it would be greatful.

now this was not help ful

Yes that is a nice idea but have you ever thought of going up to the biggest guy on the subway and telling him your thoughts on this. I wonder what he might do, or would you even do it.

wow gold

You know it's over when one spouse brings something inside the home that replaces the family. My wife became a follower of a cult and she sold out everything to them. When that came home there was nothing left but an emptiness even though I was crazy in live with her and still am. Nonetheless it is important to seek help to see if there is a solution. Luckily there are some good reads out there.
http://helpwithmarriage.info/counseling-marriage/problems-marriage

After tring over and over to find 20 years later your in the same boat. To try again and then another 10 years have gone and the boat is the same. Same problems, same fights, same mess. Do you keep tring over and over and then you are dead. A life of sorrow and lack of joy. Or get out while you can and have some peace and joy?
Love does not pay the bills,
Love does not control
love does not have you feel worthless.
Love does not make you want to just die.

YOU may still love them, but that does not mean you are to stay in the mess. Takes 2!
I live that life. and after 32 years I am leaving. I can make it I can stand on my own.
I can have joy, peace. Truth is I am scared.

Oh my goodness, I am in the same boat. I have been married for 24 years things do not get better I just want some joy and peace just as you described. I am so scared I can not make it on my own. We can do it, you can do it. We will find happiness I know. Thank you for having the courage to post, this certainly helped me. Love, Peace and and Joy to you.

I've been married for 5 years. We have 2 kids. My husband totally ignored me for 4 and a half years of that time. He never stayed at home with me during my pregnancies, never helped with the kids much, didnt support the household. ACtually when we were first married i discovered after 10 months that the sister of my stepson is also his child. He has also been quite verbally abusive, and physical as well. Now i have had enough, he wants to be oh so sweet and caring. And i really have no motivation to try, nor do i love him anymore. Am i wrong for feeling this way? I know i may lose as i am the breadwinner, but i think i stand to lose more in the long run should i stay with him.

I've been married 30 years. There's been no love, no intimacy, and there's been dominance over that time.

We've grown apart. It hurts when I see the truth.

We've not been intimate and for 20 years perhaps sex 6 times.

I allowed myself to be dominated and not speak up, and when I've tried, it's been WW III.

Fear is what I have. Yet, I'm closer to decision of doing something to move forward to end this. I don't want to be 70 and still hurting and asking why I hadn't made a change to end this "comfortably numb" feeling.

Bob Smith
Vaughn, NM

I recommend reading, The Peacemaker, by Ken Sande. Both husband & wife together should read & seek the guidance of a christian concilliator through a reputable church.

My husband & I have been together since '95 & married since '98. He had 2 children, ages 8 & 12 from a previous marriage. They had been divorced for 5 years when we met. They were still warring till the kids were 14 & 18 when the courts set all the transactions in stone.

TRY TO BE PROGRESSIVE & FOCUS IN TAKING RESPONSIBILITY FOR SELF! PLEASE DO NOT SPEND TOOO MUCH TIME GETTING BOGGED DOWN WITH THE PAST - UPBRINGING! YOU MAY BE DIVORCED BEFORE YOU FIGURE IT ALL OUT! TAKE HOLD OF SELF!

Please first acknowledge that you &/or your husband may not have been raised properly in your childhood home no matter that your parents may have been married forever (or not). Seek Christian counseling on how to have a Christian marriage. Right now there are many seminars & books that talk about Love & Respect! Most women need love from husband & most men need Respect from the wife! Its biblical! Their are some Men that need more Love & some women that need more Respect! Sometimes we just communicate different but have same goals. It makes our marriages seem impossible at times but when we have knowledge & understanding about why we are the way we are then preconceived notions or wrong thoughts are easier to let go.