I am married to someone who does not step up to the plate and do his share of the "chore" end of parenting (ex. putting kids to bed, bath time, cleaning up after children too young to fully clean up after themselves, parent/teacher interviews, diaper changes) My husband also NEVER helps with household chores (ex. washing dishes, cleaning, laundry, cooking) UNLESS I get upset. He will not sit down with me and divise up the chores. He tells me that on my days off (I work 3 days a week on average at a stressful job) I should catch up on the work then, meaning that he feels it is ok not to do the dishes for three days and then I get to do them all on my first day off. Nevermind the fact that it is extremely aggravating to try and cook with no clean pots and pans, so leaving dishes for 3 days is really not an option. I am almost always completely burned out, so resentful of him, that I typically have nothing to say to him at the end of the day. I need some help trying to convince him to do his share of housework and parenting. Divorce is not an option because I cannot handle the thought of being without my children on a daily basis, however i cannot imagine another 16 years of this misery until my son is adult. Basically, it would help tremendously if i felt he was grateful for anything that i did, but i really think he feels it is my job to do all of the work. My husbands actions suggest that he wants a housekeeper, nanny, and person who fulfills his "physical" needs rather than a life partner. I feel so used and taken for granted. i am not sure how to move forward in my marriage and practice forgiveness because he is not remotely sorry or apparently willing to help out. What do I do?

There are so many marriage obstacles that are viewed as major or devastating when you are in the first 5 to 10 years of marriage.

If couples could only hold on and find a way to overcome these obstacles they would learn years later that they weren't permanent obstacles. In fact some of the best married years are later on after a little maturity and growth occurs.

One of the problems when you are young and in love is that you think you know it all so advice is not sought or well received most of the time.

What if every young married couple were required to read tips and perspectives as laid out here or at http://restoringrelationships.info?

What a difference it could make in couples married lives.

your post is from a while now and i don't know what you did do.if you're still having the same problems i think you should evaluate whether its not worth it to get a maid instead of putting your marriage on the line because its rare to find a man who is helpful around the house. i had to get one because i go to work and can't do everything so consider that