we've got the same problem as the parents with the basketball player...my son is a good player, and can contribute both offensively and defensively as well as, if not better than the kids who play all the time - in fact other coaches he's played under ask me why he's not playing - wish I knew! Even major league teams "platoon" at different positions to give players time and keep them fresh... He's totally demoralized, and to make it worse, he's a senior and doesn't expect to get any playing time for the rest of the season...and he sits on the bench while the kid who can't catch plays because his dad teaches at the school! I know he'd like to quit, but likes baseball too much, so he at least feels he gets to play at practices and warm ups - its so sad, these coaches have no consideration for the kids they work with.

My son is on his 7th grade basketball team. He too is getting very minimal playing time. Less than 10 minutes in 3 games! My husband wants to conference with the coach, but the "athletic rules" state that playing time, strategy, position are not open to discussion. What is open for discussion?? The weather??!! Practices are closed and doors are locked and we can't even look in the windows to see what our child may need to work on because the coach hasn't given him or us any feedback. Because of their "rules", we feel like our hands are tied. How do we continue to encourage our son, talk to the coach, and keep our sanity? He made the team for Pete's sake! 12 were selected out of 53 who tried out. I do believe that the entire athletic dept.'s philosophy is winning......but we haven't won a game yet!

I have two daughters who play select soccer. (age 17 and 15). The 17 tore her right ACl when she was 14 and her left ACL when she was 15 so this is her first year she could go out for HS soccer. My other daughter is a freshman. Both made the JV HS team. Freshman scored the first goal of the season and the coach didn't say anything. Next game she didn't start. It made her question herself. Each game she seemed to play less, which depressed her. The older one does really well, but doesn't get much play time either. Coach makes older one do "chores". JV team only runs at practice much. This is causing many injuries. Varsity has great practices. I've noticed kids whose parents are "friendly" with the coach get more play time. I don't think it should work that way. What should we do? It is hurting my kids' self esteem.

Ask the coach and school administration, "What is the commitment to my child in this program?" and see what they say. I asked that exact question to the seventh grade coach and middle school principal last year when my son played a total of five minutes in the entire basketball season. They think that parents are supposed to commit to getting their kids to and from these two hour daily practices, buy dress clothes/shoes for them to wear to school on game day, buy basketball shoes to play in, take off work to attend every game, drive wherever to get to the games, pack a lunch or bring your child food on game day and yet my son doesn't play? What is the coaches/school's commitment to the children? Are they not supposed to be teaching my son how to play basketball and improve his skills; yet he's not good enough to put in a game? Maybe someone's falling short of their commitment to the children? It's a crazy philosophy that coaches have to stop believing is a good one.

Isn't that ironic that you haven't won a game yet? There are many middle school teams out there rotating all of their players every few minutes and giving them all a chance to play with a winning record. I think the coaches ability to coach a successful team of 12 people comes into question. Because isn't the coach supposed to be teaching your child how to play basketball successfully as well as improve his current skills? Isn't playing in the game part of that development? No input from parents is absolutely a rediculous philsophy to have success at anything. How can they possibly improve themselves as coaches if they have no input? I would certainly question with the administration that philosphy and ask them how's working out for them so far. I would ask the administration what is the commitment to my child from this program and see what answer you get.

My issues is sort of different, my son is a very good ball player, coaches, parents and other team mates have told him and us. He can shoot inside and outside very consistently. He enters 3 point contest every year and always finished 1,2 or 3 place. Since he is taller then most kids on his team (he's 5'9"), the coaches have decided to make him a #5 (Center, low post), and have told him he cannot come out and shoot, only get the rebounds and put it in. He is a very good ball handler and misses shooting and our delima is do we mention this to the coach on what he needs to improve on to be able to shoot/handle ball more or what. We have told him to just shoot the ball, he says he cannot, because they will pull him out of the game. - Thoughts?

My 12 year old son has played basketball for Trico school in Campbell Hill, Il. Which is a very small school in the country he has been on their 5th and 6th grade team and now is on the 7th grade team. He too has sit time after time on the bench while other boys have gotten better practice after practice, game after game. Now he wants to call it quits after this year because he feels like a loser. Trico says they will not put up with bullying but they allow their coaches to play certain ones time after time. I think that is a form of bullying and I think it's sad that schools get by with it. I spoke with the coach last year and surprise it did no good. Other parents want to complain but they don't want to confront the coaches or director because they don't want to cause more problems for their kids. I used to love basketball but thanks to Trico I can't stand it. I hate to see my son hurting.